When I was a kid, my mother once called me “anti-social” because I didn’t want to go to a party. I’ve never forgotten that.
During her childhood, a friend of mine was introduced by her mother as the “pretty, but not too smart” one. She’s never forgotten that.
Words matter. Labels can stick. Especially when they come from a parent.
So try to catch your children in the act of using their God-given gifts or exhibiting a certain character quality you want to reinforce. Identify it. Give it a name. Then point it out to them.
Let’s say you ask your son to clean his room. An hour later you check and the job is done. When you tuck him into bed, you could say, “Son, you not only got your room clean, but you did it right and you did it the first time I asked. You are someone who is responsible and trustworthy.”
Maybe your teenage daughter is trying a new hairstyle (or make-up, clothing, etc.). Try saying, “You sure are beautiful, but not just on the outside. I’m so proud of who you are.”
Your words are going to stick one way or the other. You might as well make them good ones.
You can read more interesting posts on the site HERE. It is called the DadPad, and it is a site for Dads with articles written by Dads. (I am not a Dad, but I still found a lot of the articles enlightening!)